Math teacher:if i gave you a $1 and you asked your mom for a $1, how much money will you have? student:$1 math teacher:YOU DONT KNOW MATH! student:YOU DONT KNOW MY MOTHER!!!

Why do girls eat chocolate and guys drink beer right after breaking up? Because the sweetness of chocolate makes girls forget the bitterness of breaking up while the bitterness of beer makes guys forget the sweetness of the girls. ,, :(